Kids Say the Darndest Things: May 2022 Edition

By Michael Costigan

This month, I asked my 7th grade students, “If you could have someone follow you around all the time, like a personal assistant, what would you have them do?”

Here are their responses:

“Talk to me, because no one talks to me.”

“I’m gonna have them buy me all the candy in the world, then build me a castle with all the candy that they bought, have an architect build me a sugar factory so they can make me all the candy I want.”

“I would make my personal assistant Elon Musk. He’s gonna buy me houses, cars, skittles, and a whole school so I can run around the school.”

“I’d have the person take me places, like to a cafe or to the mall. We can go on a picnic too, because I’ve never been on a picnic before.”

“They’d hug me every day.”

“Make me food, rub my feet, clean my room, and buy me a whole bunch of stuff.”